


snapshots (of this world in your colors)

by kotokei



Series: K Rarepair Week 2017 Fics [5]
Category: K (Anime)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Multi, Platonic Soulmates, Quasiplatonic Soulmates, Romantic Soulmates, capitalization is dead, the &s are equal to either quasiplatonic or platonic soulmates, the soulmate system is kind of confusing but things work out
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-11
Updated: 2017-02-11
Packaged: 2018-09-23 12:18:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,564
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9657206
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kotokei/pseuds/kotokei
Summary: a small look at all the little moments in time where homra's alphabet kids found their worlds coming into color, courtesy of each other.(or: that one AU where you see color once you meet your soulmate, only instead of one person, it's entirely possible for your colors to be split among several people.)





	

**Author's Note:**

> goodness, it was hard to think of a plausible system for this, considering these soulmate AUs are usually between two people, whereas here, we're trying to think of a system that allows for more than one soulmate on a regular basis (to the point that having separate soulmates symbolizing different relationships, or perhaps, multiple soulmates for any one of these relationships, is pretty normalized). 
> 
> not entirely sure i succeeded, to be honest. but...while the fic doesn't go into it, here's a tiny amount of background for the universe: upon being conceived, everyone is fitted with a flexible watch which filters in colors associated with the person once you meet a potential/very likely soulmate (it's not a guarantee that you'll be on great terms with the person or anything like that). these colors are usually based on what colors suit them from your perspective. boundaries between colors are rather arbitrary and everyone is taught to match grays to what color they would be when young.

shouhei is five when his father first tells him that one day, he'll meet someone (or, perhaps, several someones, his mother chimes in) who'll put the color into his then-monochrome world.

he's six when san-chan pulls him out of the river, and he stares at the older child because bandou's shirt isn't grey anymore. instead, he's looking at red and blue and yellow and the colors are so beautiful that he can't stop looking at them in awe. saburouta apparently has the same problem, shock written all over his face as he gapes right back.

things are suddenly _wonderful_ , even when he gets a cold from staying outside with wet clothes on the very next day.

(shouhei can't get enough, and he starts gravitating towards these colors, the hues and shades that he can see as something other than greys. his mother laughs when he chooses red and yellow pajamas, his father ruffles his hair in amusement when he picks one toy over another solely because the other one didn't come in blue. they're supportive and accommodating, and they seem to like bandou just fine when he comes over to visit one day, all awkward attempts at good manners and flailing limbs.

which is why it hurts all the more when he's told that they're moving away.)

* * *

chitose first sees colors in middle school.

it's something he dreams of, something he wants with every fiber of his being, but no matter how many friends he has, no matter how many people he gets to know, it doesn't happen.

(some things can't be rushed.)

not until he befriends dewa, not until something clicks between them that sends the cloudless sky into a constant, solid blue and the grass, still wet with the morning mist, into vibrant greens.

(years later, he jokes that they're his blues and greens because they're his world. they call him an unoriginal sap and shoo him from the kitchen, but not before they let him sneak a spoonful of the thankfully non-spicy dinner they're preparing under fujishima's watchful supervision, since their own idea of "not spicy" has the rest gagging and reaching frantically for milk.)

they're almost late in going back to class, both of them too enthralled by their surroundings mixing their respective colors with the familiar grays, and neither really focuses afterwards, too engrossed by any hint of red and blue or blue and green.

(in high school, chitose meets his red/violet, and he spends an entire afternoon with dewa excitedly jabbering about finally being able to see the 'red' color masaomi loves so much.

in a little over a year, both red and violet would fade into dull greys again.) 

* * *

fujishima's been with HOMRA for maybe three months when he brings a small black cat he's pet-sitting to the bar. kusanagi sighs, but allows the endearing little ball of fur inside.

it probably helps that the kitten came with a bow, a top hat, and tiny glasses - there had been a lot of people cooing at it on his way over, and it's no different inside the bar, customers coming up to take pictures with the affectionate little creature.

by the time chitose and dewa come in together (per usual), however, the bar is mostly empty. chitose laughs when he sees what fujishima has on his lap, giving the kitten a light pat, while dewa just looks mildly exasperated ("i guess at least your 'business' is thriving" is all they say).

in response, fujishima lifts up the cat to their eye level and tips the little hat upwards with one finger, much like how the young black-haired adult tends to do.

this has the twofold effect of setting chitose off for real ("oh my god it's _you_ , i always knew you were a cat person") and getting dewa to roll their eyes at him, even as a begrudging smile ruins their attempt to look cross with him.

fujishima looks at the two of them, looks at chitose still cackling in delight, all pretenses of looking suave forgotten, looks at how dewa's expression softens to fond annoyance at the both of them, warmth in their eyes, and he sees red and blue and green and indigo and orange for the first time (and oh, it's beautiful, the way red looks on both of them, the way they contrast the green of the leafy plants totsuka got during his gardening phase).

they both look surprised at the wondering, amazed smile that lightens up his face, and then chitose goes "you-?!" in shock before he smiles kind of weakly, signaling kusanagi for a drink. dewa smacks his arm lightly in a half-hearted rebuke but doesn't make a move to stop him otherwise, staring at their new soulmate in something like consternation and awe at the same time.

the colors seem to fade a little for him at the thought that perhaps his soulmates don't want him, paling from their former vibrancy, and he looks away from them to where the kitten is purring loudly as anna pets it (no one ever has, why would they be any different? why did you let yourself think otherwise? because they're _supposed_  to love you, to care about you?).

something must show on his face, though, because dewa snaps out of their silence to hurriedly say, "no, it's not...it's not a bad thing. and it's not because of you."

"chitose has...bad memories when it comes to romantic soulmates, if that's the kind of relationship you'd want with him, and i'm not very good with the pressure of being soulmates with someone especially if. if they want to be lovers," they sigh, fiddling with the drink chitose passes them.

fujishima looks back to the two of them at that, "we don't have to do anything about this. i'm okay with just being friends."

"you're okay with it, but are you happy with that?" chitose peers at him closely, all traces of the carefree flirty persona gone from his face. caught by his serious, genuine stare, fujishima shrugs in lieu of an actual answer. it would have been nice to get closer, to feel loved, but...

he doesn't want to hurt either of them in the process. even if he's not as special as he would have liked to be to them, they've become special to him.

and yet...

"fujishima, we have to talk about this," dewa plies, looking a little upset, "we need to know what you _want_  to come to the best possible outcome for all of us. talk to us."

(is it really that easy?)  
  
"i want to be everything the stories tell us soulmates are, whether romantic or quasiplatonic or platonic" he admits, "but i don't want to trouble you guys."

"well then! all you had to do was ask," chitose says, some levity back in his voice, "not sure i could've done romance with you, or, well, anyone else, and i think dewa's the only qpp i'll ever need or want, but i think we could try to make the whole platonic soulmates thing work."

"as long as you're okay with me maybe not...being into the concept of romance or the whole soulmates thing in general as much as you are, we can try getting closer," dewa adds slowly, the signs of agitation from earlier smoothing into hesitant anticipation, "and we can see what develops from there...?"

he can feel his surprise and disbelief on his face, but he nods his acceptance anyways and the slight washed-out look of their colors darkens until they're as beautiful as they were moments ago. 

* * *

as soon as totsuka asks him what he's going to do about shouhei's plans to rescue his friend, bandou's racing off towards where dewa had spotted the other going, uncharitable thoughts borne of worry almost drowned out by all the rain. the only comfort is that he knows shouhei is still alive - the blue and red of his own shirt hasn't faded away, so he isn't too late.

even with this, however, he feels much better once he actually sees his first soulmate, standing in front of a building all by himself.

"shouhei!"

"san-chan? what are you doing here?" the brat has the nerve to ask.

"i'm here to help you, why else would i be here? it's not like i know your girlfriend," he says, shrugging a little uncomfortably at the sudden intrusive thought that maybe shouhei left all those years ago for her (but bandou would have understood, maybe, one day, there was no need for akagi to go so far).  
  
"oh, she's not my girlfriend," shouhei says, looking like this is something he says often, "she's my indigo. we're platonic soulmates."

and somehow that only makes things worse, shouhei having already met another of his soulmates. maybe the friendly and popular akagi shouhei has found all of his soulmates, each one equally as good as him.

(unlike bandou)

maybe losing each other didn't mean half as much to shouhei as it did to him, no matter how happy akagi was to see him again (and why would it? bandou was the one who was left behind, after all). nevertheless, they have a job to do. it's not like the gang inside will just wait forever.

(afterwards, shouhei explains that she's like what fujishima and chitose are to each other, and what fujishima and dewa used to be before kosuke asked them to try out romance with him. it's a nice reminder that the soulmate dynamics of that trio are all different, just like his and shouhei's and that girl's could be, but bandou still can't help blurting out, "are _we_  still soulmates?"

"i know it's been a long time, but i still think of you as one. is that okay?" shouhei asks in response, looking a little shy.

his stomach settles, and bandou exhales in relief, "yeah. that's...more than okay."

shouhei looks a little curious and sad, though. "san-chan, did you...did you really think i wouldn't want you? there's more soulmates than not that end up like the ideal."

this isn't a topic he wants to go into, but bandou shrugs, "well, you left, and the next time i see you, it's with another person and she's more than a friend. besides, you could have wanted to be like kusanagi-san and dewa."

"huh?! they're soulmates? and i didn't _want_  to leave, my parents had to! i'm sorry we fell out of touch, though, i never meant for that to happen."

"yeah, but they both think it's awkward so they decided not to do anything about it. totsuka-san said he thinks it's the case where two people have really similar souls. and, uh, speaking of dewa, they had something happen with the whole unwanted soulmate thing, so, it's...not really as uncommon as you think it is," he leaves akagi's explanation alone, unsure of what to make of that yet. it disproves a lot of the thoughts that had been swarming in his head; he needs time to think about it.

shouhei frowns a little, possibly at his non-address of what shouhei said about moving, taking the hand that's not in a sling and pressing forward so that their faces are a scant few inches apart. bandou's face turns fluorescent red, and he's suddenly even more aware of the lack of his sunglasses.

"well, i want you. you're my soulmate, and we might not know what kind yet, but as long as you want me too, then i'm still yours."

the earnest sincerity is too much and bandou flails backwards, tripping neatly over the bench and jarring his arm all over again.

"ow..."

"san-chan?!" 

* * *

chitose's commiserating with him over something in the way that only he does when bandou looks up and the other's jacket is suddenly a dark, vivid blue and the lights behind him are a glaring yellow. you doesn't seem to have noticed anything different, but he pauses in his gesturing when bandou gawks at him.

"what? is there something on my face? hello? earth to bandou?"

"that's uh. i really like the color of your jacket," he manages, clearing his throat forcefully enough to accidentally make himself cough.

"huh? well, yeah, i do t--oh. _oh._ "

"wait, you don't see anything different?" bandou asks, tentative.

"not yet, but it could be like...hold on," chitose says, scrolling on his phone, "aha! yeah, it was indigo. think shouhei'll go on a date with both of us at the same time?"

"it won't be weird 'cause i'm a soulmate to both of you but you guys aren't soulmates to each other, will it?" saburouta looks a bit worried at the thought, but chitose shrugs.

"i don't know about him, but i don't care. i mean, i've been dating him longer than the two of us have been soulmates."

"yeah, that's true...wait! do you want. does this mean you want to date me? or are we just both dating shouhei on one date?"

bandou's not sure he knows what he's hoping chitose will say, but the chestnut-haired man only goes, "i'm okay with either, to be honest. after the whole thing with maria, i figured some things out on the romance end, _finally_ , and well, it's been nice being with shouhei. it might be nice with you too, but we won't know until we try it. if you want to, and if shouhei's cool with it."

saburouta feels a little faint, but he nods anyways.

(they call him together to ask about it. shouhei is _ecstatic_.)

* * *

it's a little under two years after fujishima finds eric and brings him to homra that he finds himself entranced by the golden yellow of the younger's hair.

they're at a shelter with the animal lover's newest stray, a lovable little terrier that had been roaming the streets all alone, and eric's petting the abandoned dog absentmindedly while trying to convince him not to turn around and take it home after all (dewa would definitely not be pleased with a surprise pet, and eric doesn't really want additional chores, especially when they already have animals at home).

it's the thought of the home that he's made with the two of them, something that a younger fujishima would have never believed possible, that makes the color come into view, bringing with it the lavender of the room.

eric looks up at his gasp of surprised delight, and then stops short, staring at the walls in silent wonder. fujishima watches his partner's breathless awe, his blue eyes wide, and feels a pang of familiar sadness that the blond never really had opportunities to meet anyone who might give him his colors before homra.

then eric's eyes focus on him, and there's a small, sharp intake of breath. fujishima waits patiently, even though there's a deep curiosity to what other colors eric's seeing. he doesn't have to wait long.

"your hair...it's so. bright."

kosuke laughs a little, helplessly _happy_  and all the lighter for it, at that, "it is, yeah. yours is too, in a different way."

eric's eyes reflexively shoot to his own bangs, but red, and not yellow, is the third color he can see from fujishima, so they remain their usual shade of gray for him.

"i can't see it, but it shouldn't be as bright as yours...anyways, let's get going. i...want to look around, but. i don't want to be late for dinner..." the blond says, looking at the time.

fujishima checks his own phone. there's more than an hour until dewa gets home from work and they're not actually very far from the shared townhouse, but he's sure it'll be a long walk by virtue of the familiar route becoming an entirely different scene for eric.

(he texts dewa the news. they end up going out to a restaurant to celebrate, and eric spends a good solid minute just gawking in horror at the devilish, dangerous-looking red of dewa's food.

masaomi, used to this reaction, only asks if he'd like to try some with a decidedly insincere smile.

perhaps it's because they're generally rather placid and sarcastic that fujishima never really picks up the hint of unease from them.) 

* * *

it's years after they first met that bandou first sees indigo-violet, years until dewa finds their last color glimmering into view, though it's not too long after fujishima and eric manifest each other's colors.

they're at HOMRA when it happens - a slow night has kusanagi and anna watching some of totsuka's old videos upstairs and no one else is there yet, but dewa's already a couple of drinks in.

it looks a lot like they're actually trying to get incredibly, dangerously drunk, which is a rare enough thing that bandou is kind of worried. they wave off his questions, however. when he pushes, the increasingly bitter irritation in their tone warns him to leave the issue alone.

they end up breaking the silence that falls upon the bar at that themself, setting their glass down to ask (he assumes it's a question to him, even if they're staring very, very hard at kusanagi's liquor display), "do you ever think that maybe people would be better off without you?"

he blinks. that's not something he thought dewa, who is reliable and perceptive and generally well-liked, would ever say. and normally, he might say something like, "no, definitely not!", but it feels like a decidedly bad time to posture.

so instead, he sets aside the urge to cover his insecurities with overt denial, and admits, "um, yeah, sometimes. i used to think that a lot more than i do now, though."

they nod once to show they've heard him, but then they just stare down at their drink instead of elaborating on why they asked. he has the thought that at least they're not making any motion to tear through this one.

"do you know why you're feeling like that less now?" the question is hesitant. it sounds an awful lot like they're asking for help, and bandou winces because, "i don't really know for sure, but it's probably? probably because chitose and shouhei tell me otherwise all the time. i sorta used to think that because shouhei's so good and i'm me, but...i just kinda started believing him more. both of them. i don't really know why, sorry."

they shake their head at his apology, dismissing it with a quick "it's fine", like they want to take back this entire conversation, but saburouta can't help feeling like he's disappointed them somehow, like he's said something wrong along the way (yet again, he finds himself wishing that he could read people as well as shouhei).

"hey, you know if something's wrong, you can talk to any of us, right? i'm sure fujishima and eric would definitely listen, too, even if eric's--"

"they're the problem!"

silence.

dewa swallows, looking caught before their expression goes from upset to ashamed to shuttered. bandou has no idea what to say to that, but before he can wrack his brain for an answer, masaomi contradicts their own exclamation, this time with a much quieter, "it's not them. i'm the issue."

he can't think of a time when he's ever heard them this bitter. even during the earliest days of eric's arrival, when they had been angry and protective over fujishima and totsuka and everyone else, they had never sounded this downright loathing (it reminds him of himself, and he doesn't like it).

"well, i. i meant what i said, no matter what's bothering you. if you can't talk about it to them, you can still tell me! i mean, hey, i'm not in any position to judge you or anything, since i'm me," he jokes self-deprecatingly, referring to how most of HOMRA teases him about being petty and self-centered.

"you're one of the most compassionate and loyal people i know in your own strange bandou way," they huff, which is nice of them given the circumstances, if a little concerning regarding the use of the words 'strange' and 'bandou' right next to each other, but he's not distracted.

"seriously, it really helps. i mean, if you really don't want to talk to me, at least tell chitose or kusanagi-san or someone who doesn't know any of us," bandou tries.

dewa sighs, but perhaps the amount of alcohol has loosened their tongue, because, "i keep thinking ko--fujishima and eric are just fine on their own, okay? it's idiotic but i can't stop looking at them together and thinking oh hey, they're really good for each other, which is _great_ , but then my fucking brain takes it one step further and tells me that i'm just some kind of _intruder_.

it's like hey, look at them, they're perfect together! they fit each other in ways _you_  never will. they don't need you, which is supposed to be a good thing and it is, but now i keep feeling like an onlooker or something, like maybe it _would_  be better if i just backed out, and i can't help thinking that maybe if i wasn't so averse to sex, or maybe if i....if i was just a little more into romance, maybe if i could give both of them _more_ , like the people in those ideal soulmate stories...

then i wouldn't feel like i'm in the background of my own damn relationship."

they punctuate the end of their rant by upending the rest of the glass.

bandou...has no idea what to say to that, but he carefully edges the bottle a little farther away from them (the sound of their scoff probably means they completely saw what he did, but they don't reach over him for it, so he counts it as a win).

"you don't have to say anything, you know. so you can stop floundering," dewa's glaring at their empty glass as they speak. saburouta continues to wish he had shouhei's ability to comfort people and say the right thing nonetheless, because he _wants_  to help, _wants_  to cheer them up. it's so damn hard to watch the expression on their face, especially knowing what's on their mind. 

finally, after a few silent and uneasy minutes, he settles on, "uh, you should probably talk to them about that, which you probably already knew, but. i'm pretty sure they don't think they're better off without you? and i'm also pretty sure that you don't need to give them anything that would hurt you, but the only way to know for sure-sure about both of those things is to talk to them, so..."

dewa doesn't reply to that for a long, long while, only jerking their shoulders in a shrugging motion to let him know that they heard him, but eventually, they let out a long exhale.

"i can't be sure because i'm drunk, but i think you just gave solid advice," masaomi starts, continuing firmly before bandou can react with more than a small cry of indignation, "so thank you. i know i should talk to them, i've just been putting it off because i don't. want to hear it if my thoughts get confirmed, but. you're right. it doesn't help to just internalize all this."

"i'm right? i mean, of course i am, i would never steer you wrong," saburouta puffs his chest out, pointing his thumb at himself. this gets him an exasperated eye-roll, but that is such an exponentially better look on them than the terrible expression they had on before that he almost laughs in relief.

which is when two new colors ripple right into his field of vision in the neat lines of wine bottles kusanagi keeps behind the bar, and he almost falls off his stool in shock.

dewa looks at him quizzically at the movement before turning to check out what he's staring at and freezing as well.

"i guess _we_  have something to talk about," they say weakly, looking a bit floored.   
  
(and they do end up discussing it, albeit when dewa's completely sober. eventually, they decide to simply see where things end up for the two of them naturally, especially considering all the different prior obligations they have already.) 

* * *

as it turns out, violet and indigo aren't the last colors to manifest between HOMRA members.

nothing particularly out-of-the-ordinary, however, happens for shouhei to see purple and green.

he's in the middle of teaching eric about the upcoming olympics since they're taking place in japan that year. it's just one of the many things he's been the one to tell the blond about, shouhei's willingness to teach, steady patience, and nonjudgmental kindness having made him eric's go-to about such things ever since he taught them how to swim all those years ago.

it's something about the way eric listens to his explanation, quiet but attentive, something about the way he stares at akagi with rapt interest when shouhei describes past opening ceremonies with gusto, the way he still likes to sit with his arms around his knees but seems way more open anyhow, a far cry from when he first came to HOMRA, something about how he teases yata and bandou and sometimes, chitose, but always treats shouhei like something, someone, special, in a way incredibly different from how he fits at fujishima's side, in a way very different from how he and dewa had started really meshing years ago....

that's when eric's jacket turns into a darker forest green and he stops short while recounting beijing's fireworks show. eric blinks at his sudden pause and his expression, before the blond's face shows surprise and confusion and the tiniest hint of distress, "i'm guessing you saw some color, but nothing looks different for me."

shouhei snaps out of it to reach for his phone, "oh! here, check if it's indigo? san-chan and you had that happen before..."

but eric shakes his head afterwards, "it's not. why don't i see something too...?"

"i...well, i'm not sure, but maybe there isn't enough potential on your end? i'm sorry you don't get more colors, if you were looking forward to them...." shouhei bites his lip.

"it's fine. i just," eric struggles for a moment and then says, so quietly akagi can barely hear him at all, "didn't want to disappoint you, that's all."

the older smiles at him, touched, "you didn't, don't worry! there's nothing _wrong_ , this happens more than people like to admit, but it's okay. i mean, sometimes it's a sad thing, but not always, and it doesn't have to be, especially for us."

eric doesn't look completely convinced, but shouhei has always tried to be truthful, to steer him right, so he nods.

"is there anything i should do...?"

shouhei ponders on that for a moment, "not really! if you _want_  to do something like hang out more, we can, since i like being with you anyways and hopefully you do too, but there's nothing in particular that i can think of."

eric flushes a little like he always does when someone he likes or at least respects compliments him, and shouhei resists the urge to ruffle his hair, but just barely, grinning at him instead.

(perhaps violet and green won't be the last.

perhaps eric will manifest colors from shouhei, delayed colors uncommon but not unheard of.

but those are things only the future will tell.) 

**Author's Note:**

> honestly, a bit of a tagging nightmare in the relationships section....(koto, back at it again with the poly relationships. and the explicit aro-ace headcanon.)
> 
> wonder if anyone was able to catch at least two..teaching moments, between characters? well, with that ambiguous wording, most likely not. but at least two people learned something and then applied it later, though one instance of application wasn't in the fic, but refers to canon. x) 
> 
> there's a lot of potential for more in this verse, as is the case with a couple of these AUs. i might try writing more, but we'll see. aftermath kind of feels like it could've taken place here. 
> 
> fun tidbit that has little to do with this fic besides them being in the fic at all: akagi, dewa, and fujishima are the kids i headcanon as nonbinary. 
> 
> it's back to work for me...bye bye for now u w u;;/


End file.
